5 Things I like to do as a Daddy

Have you ever wondered what other Daddys do? I know I have, and I’ve even watched YouTube videos and read posts just to find out. So I felt like a little list of things I like to do as a Daddy would help anyone searching for such a thing.

Keep in mind though that everyone is an individual and you may not want to do the things I do, or even agree with things I say. That’s okay, we all have different approaches. That being said, you may enjoy all the things I put on here and decide to adopt them into your lifestyle also! And that’s okay!

I hope, for whatever reason you’re here, that you find some use out of this list. So here are my five things I like to do as a Daddy:

1. Be available to be contacted by my Little

This is SO important to me. You have committed yourself to a Little. Therefore you should (within reason: i.e. work permitting) always be reachable by your Little. Your Little needs to feel safe and cared for, wanted and loved. Being able to be in contact often will only serve to strengthen any relationship and maintain the connection developed between you to as Daddy and Little.

2. Engaging in activities with my Little

Whether this be doing a painting, colouring in an activity book, watching a film, going for a walk, or having a tickle time; joining in with an activity that your Little wants to do is important. They are inviting you into their space because they want to have you there with them. Little space is a beautiful time for watch and learn as a Daddy, you can see what stimulates your Little and be involved with their activities with them. Thats a privilege any Daddy should be grateful for.

3. Having a set Routine for my Little

I have a routine set with my Little. A time she should wake up, a time she should go to bed. How many times to brush her teeth, how many showers she should have in a week and a list of chores, both daily and monthly. This helps our lifestyle stay structured, it also helps her know what I expect of her and how she can follow it. This also grants her the ability to earn rewards by being a good girl and sticking to her routines, while it also leaves room for improvements and punishments should she be lax on her adherence to the schedules. A routine is a great way to keep structure and familiarity in your DDLG lifestyle and I highly recommend it.

4. Affection with my Little

This feels obvious but there is a deeper reason. To connect with someone physically is one of the most emotionally rewarding acts you can have. In a DDLG relationship, the Daddy and the Little have a closer bond than most. The Little has submitted themselves to their Daddy through acts of love, trust, need and admiration. The Daddy has committed himself to his Little by way of caring, love, protection and development towards his Little. It’s an entwining of two people who need one another. To combine this with acts of physical affection really does forge a deep bond and relationship between the two parties. I often find myself in deep need of just hugs and closeness with my little one. It’s a craving that can last all day until satisfied. It’s not always a sexual need as a DDLG relationship is not just about sex (unless yours is, then good for you!), it’s about caregiving and loving, protection and safety, learning and development, and just physical affection in any form is perfect.

5. Being with my Little in the big world

This one may sound weird, and potentially, it is. I love going out with my Little in public places and letting her explore and be herself. This is in parks, shopping centres, restaurants etc. She feels safe and protected when she is with me and this allows her to be free and ‘Little’ whenever she likes. She can be in her Littlespace while we are out and it’s adorable for me to watch and even better for me to be a part of. It makes me genuinely so happy to watch her running through shops showing me all the things she thinks is pretty or fun, because knowing she feels safe enough to be herself wherever she wants to be makes me realise I am doing the right thing as her Daddy.

Thank you for reading these. I hope they’ve given you a bit of an insight into both me and a lifestyle of a Daddy!

Daddy Style

When I first began exploring the ‘Daddy’ side of my life, I searched for help as I was unsure of how to undertake the role of the Daddy. I had my natural instinct, but I think through conversation, and maybe even modern media depictions of the ‘dominant role’, I seemed to have a misconception around what a Daddy should be.

In my search I found very little from the perspective of a Daddy, and even less helpful content within that still. This is why I chose to write this blog, in hope that others may read the journey that I am on and also find their questions or curiosities answered. I am also aiming to have this blog provide some insight into the rewards and challenges of having a Little and being a Daddy as there are things I wish I knew at the beginning of my journey and I wish to share that with you too.

So I want to share with you a bit of context about myself as a Daddy first.

When my relationship with my Little began, and as previously mentioned, I struggled to understand what type of Daddy I was. I started by thinking I had to be a cold, hard stern figure that dished punishments out like sweets who also enjoyed causing pain to my Little. I very quickly learned that that style felt so very unnatural to me as it did not fit with my personality. My Little (who is also my girlfriend) indicated to me that she was not into that kind of treatment and I found that she did not respond to it well, nor respond in the way that I wanted her too.

I realised change was needed and through discussion and exploration with my Little, I learned that I had to be natural and true to myself within my approach. I am a naturally caring person and that is my Daddy style, as I will always lean on the side of progression, learning and development of my Little through care, love and attention rather than a forceful and dominant approach; akin to an ruling with an iron fist.

We both preferred this caring approach rather than the cold dominant style that may work for others, as it was something that felt a lot more natural to us and it has continued to be the way we are in our relationship, to great enjoyment from us both.

What I found is that as a Daddy, you have to act the way in which you find the most appropriate to you. Do not try to be something that does not come naturally to you as that will lead to a forced relationship with your Little. This isn’t beneficial to either of you, if you also consider the space that a Little finds themselves in with their Daddy, its a potentially damaging situation to bring a Little into a DDLG relationship that does not have the kind of caregiving that they may need as a Little trusts, loves and relies on their Daddy and often looks to them in times of emotional and physical need (this is true of both sexual and non-sexual DDLG relationships). Firstly, you need to care for yourself as a Daddy and make sure you have your emotions and needs in check and in the right place before you find yourself a Little that you will be in a position of power and care over.

I find that communication is vital within any DDLG relationship (within any relationship for that fact!). Make sure channels of conversation are available to be open at all times with your Little, as they may need to talk to you about things they may or may not be happy with. Something to watch for as a Daddy is that your Little maybe too shy to speak to you about something they are unhappy with. Consider that your Little is under your care and that they put you in a position of authority and power in their head. They may not be able to easily bring up a problem with you in fear of a negative reaction from you as a their Daddy. Imagine a child trying to tell their father that they have a problem with their parenting skills. It can be a daunting task. I have found a few easy ways to engage with my Little and allow her to speak to me freely. Here are a few ideas for you to try:

  • Set aside a specific time every week i.e. 9pm on a Tuesday, that you and your Little can sit and chat to one another and know that there will be no judgement of anything spoken about during that time.
  • Create a space in your home that is known as the ‘Conversation Spot’ (call it what you like, obviously!) and whenever you are both sat in the spot, you know you can have open and honest conversation.
  • Have an item that represents a time to speak freely and whenever either one of you holds it, it is a symbol to the other that a conversation is wanted.

These are just a few ways in which you can create a space or time that makes it easier to have an open conversation with one another. Remember, it does not always need to be about problems either. You can have a conversation about good things that you both are enjoying or maybe things you may like to do or try together. Don’t just use it for a space to complain as you would not want to create a negative attachment to your conversation space as that may bring fear or sadness to you or your Little whenever the space is utilised.

I strongly recommend to everyone that you converse with one another to understand both your needs within your relationship and that way you will find yourself in a beneficial, fun and fulfilling DDLG relationship.